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turning chaos into euphoria
the ebbs and flows of my frustrations leave me unable to express my desires the emotions I’m always told are too much too sensitive “nobody cares” – but they do. I feel and hear everything, all at once, it’s not euphoric, it’s chaotic chaos I channel into happiness, and my everyday bliss for life –…
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the day the air was fresh
I think if you can find joy in how green the leaves look, how sweet the air feels in through your nose & how your lungs accept the air, the richness of the blue in the sky and the shapes of the clouds – then you have the means to be happy everyday of your…
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Am I sorry?
I could say sorry for a million things everyday But I don’t want to be sorry anymore I’m sorry I don’t feel like talking to anyone I’m sorry I get overwhelmed so easy I’m sorry I don’t make a lot of money I’m sorry I get so emotional I’m sorry I had attitude I’m sorry…
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what does it mean to hear nothing, how does it feel
so much noise at once the softness of spiderwebs in the grass the distant smoke seeping into the trees screams inside the chainsaw echo tree branches swaying, though the air is still cracks in the fence show shadows that aren’t there the air, exquisite, making all the noise worth it no clouds. Just blue, finally?…
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365 +- 3155 = forever
How could it already be 365 days? All I had with you was 3,155 days. Those days I replay in my head throughout the last 365, and for the rest of my life. Almost every moment accounted for. But counting the days is irrelevent. Sure it makes me grateful, I’ll be grateful for the rest…
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it’s actually not okay.
It’s like you plan it. Like you know exactly when you’re going to do it.There’s a look in your eye and a smirk on your face & you tense up just enough to look guilty as fuck.And I laugh it off and go along with it. Still.As soon as we’re done, I think “well that’s…
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Boundaries
I’m done feeling like I need to be accepted by you to feel worthy or good about myself. I don’t wish to be apart of anything that doesn’t allow me to be my full self. I am swearing to myself to create healthy boundaries that keep me at peace. I want to feel good about…
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all the little cracks. hello to the new decade.
I think since I graduated high school, every year of my life has gotten better. I’ve continued to become happier as each day turns into weeks, months and years. Coming from such a dark place that was K-12, I emerged excited and overwhelmed with freedom. It’s taken me almost 7 years to figure out what…
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keeping up with the seasons
Over the last few months I have learned quite a bit more about the people around me. I’ve always considered myself an empathetic person. And I’ve been pretty outspoken that I think empathy is something everyone should possess. The sad truth is, so many people do not have the ability to put themselves into someone…
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Mad at myself for being mad.
There’s no way I can stop being mad at you, deep down, I always will be. But I need to find a way to stop thinking about you, anticipating you, and wondering about you. I want to stop thinking about you. I need to stop thinking about you. For the rest of my life. But…
perksofbeingmel
– love, life, & seeking understanding
perksofbeingmel 